Sick Day...

One of the worst things about taking a sick day from work, other than the whole "being sick" part of it, is how good you tend to feel while you sit home idle, doing nothing.

You sit at work one day coughing "stuff" up and dealing with a runny nose.  You're eyes are burning, your lungs are irritated then you get the chills and you have some nausea.  It's not stomach bug nausea but it's the whole "what the hell did my sinuses just pass down the back of my throat" type nausea.  I'm sorry if that's a bit graphic but it's true.  I'm somewhat convinced that ingesting large amounts of mucus is probably not ideal for my stomach!  There's that gross "bit graphic" I was referring to before.... My apologies, again...

So, there you are sitting at work dealing with all of the symptoms and having that whole internal battle with yourself of "I'm dying" versus "No you're not it's either allergies or a cold; don't be stupid.... of course you won't know for sure until you either die or you don't!" 

And you cave in when you realize that:

1. You feel like hell
2. Your productivity is really falling quickly
3. Your co-workers don't deserve to have to deal with all of the obnoxious bodily functions of yours that are suddenly in overdrive
4. Your co-workers don't need to catch whatever you have if it's catchable
5. Your co-workers DON'T WANT YOU THERE
6. Yup, you're dying

So, you slip out of the office when you've had enough and completed all of your necessary work.

That night you take a handful of pills and sprays that some guy you know, who talked to a girl he knows, who just met up someone, who spoke to a pharmacy tech who's studying to be a pharmacist (but really wants to act), recommended for each individual symptom you have, sort of.  And now you've just started your very own private rave in your house.  At least, it felt that way.  You're now exhausted from coughing so much all day but you're FREAKIN' WIRED from all of the meds that are apparently designed to give you enough jitters to simply shake the bad germs out of your system.

You go to bed and stare for a few hours.

Eventually you get up and you know for certain you'll be dead by noon.  It's only five am so it probably isn't the best time to start texting or calling a co-worker or two.  You wait until 5:15 to tell them.  They don't care.  More than anything, they're just happy you're staying away from them.  They are TOTALLY going to talk about you today and most likely assume you are lying....

You have a cup of coffee to start your day and promptly fall asleep for the best 2 hours of sleep you've had all night.  Why did the coffee that usually keeps you up put you to sleep?  It's obvious... YOU'RE DYING!!!

When you wake back you feel somewhat refreshed.  You go to your favorite chair in the living room and you sit and watch tv for a few hours.  And suddenly it dawns on you, "Holy Crap!  I feel GREAT!"

You sit there and run that through your head for a bit.... Is this the peaceful feeling before dying?  Am I really lying?  Did I jitter out all of the bad germs?  What was in that coffee?

And then you do what EVERYBODY always does when they are either in denial that something is wrong, embarrassed that they might really be sick or "HAVEN'T GOT TIME TO BE SICK!!!"  You start doing stuff... What the hell is your problem?

After about five minutes, you suddenly realize that it was the whole calm before the storm thing and you probably have about 5 minutes to live.

That's when you decide it's time go lay back down and stop blogging .... for five minutes.